Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Pathetic nicknames

BYU and Utah have a great rivalry. There's a lot of anger there, sure, but mostly it's a rivalry full of passion and respect.

I like the rivalry. It's good for the sport. Having one final feat of strength, casting down your fiercest enemy in the last game of the season--it's all good stuff.

What I don't like, however, is the stupid, silly, incredibly lame nicknames fans give other fans. They mask these conjured words as biting insults, meant for ridicule and taunting, but really these nicknames just make the speaker/writer look like a child.

Here are some examples:

  • Names for Bronco Mendenhall: BronKo, Donko, Chaps
  • Names for Kyle Whittingham: Kryle, Kwhitt, Twhitt
  • Names for BYU: Zoobieville, byU
  • Names for the Cougars: Kewgs, Kewgars, Zoobs, TDS
  • Names for the Utes: Yewts, Ewets, Pukes, Pirates

See what I mean? The whole language looks like it was invented by a six-year-old. And it's not that I'm against taunting, but come on--BronKo? Yewts? What do those words even mean? Why is the K capitalized?

I mean, can you as an adult ever picture yourself writings something like "BronKo and the kewgars are going to get pounded by Utah this year!"

As asinine as it sounds, though, there are hundreds of grown men that write the very same thing (with slight variations) every day on message boards, chat rooms, blogs and other sites.

If you find yourself in this group, consider this a call to action. Abandon your lame nicknames and start from scratch. If you do insist on calling your rival names, at least come up with something intelligent. And I'm talking to both sides, here. BYU fans are just as bad as Ute fans in this regard.

Needless to say, if I read the words "kewgar" or "Yewt" too many more times I'm gonna puke.

6 comments:

Russ Nelson said...

Puke, that's a funny word. Do you mind if I use that. Try this one on for size: The University of Utah Pukes.

Trevor said...

How bout we call them the Gayballs Up North? Or Team Satan? Or I Hope All the Utes and Their Children Die? I guess that one's not a nickname, but I still feel that way.

Trevor said...

And GREAT pic by the way

Bryce said...

That picture is great.

Those nicknames are terrible. However, I can't think of any that would be much better.

I just like winning.

Rock said...

You left out "YBU." It's a Facebook trash-talk favorite.

And this is just a guess, but I think "BronKo" refers to "ShopKo." That's why they capitalize the K.

Travis said...

Those yewtin' yewts are just jealous that Kryle Twhittingham will never be as holy and righteous as Bronco. haha