Monday, December 08, 2008
I spent the night with Aggie fans
I’m sorry I have to do this, but I wanted to talk a bit about Saturday night’s game.
Actually, I don’t want to talk about the game so much, but I would like to comment on Utah State and its fans.
I know you don’t care about Utah State. In fact, I know no one outside Cache Valley cares about Utah State, but I’ll risk boring all you true sports fans out there for a bit while I speak my mind.
First of all, I want to say that the game was awesome. My heart was pumping like an overweight Texas Sherriff the entire time. Both teams delivered a great game, and I’m happy BYU won.
Second, Aggie fans totally showed up their Cougar counterparts. I was sitting in the middle of the court so I could clearly see both student sections. The USU student section showed up earlier, they were louder, they were more organized and they had a bigger impact on the game. I was disappointed in my fellow BYU fans (especially the students), and I was also impressed with Utah State. You can’t say they lack passion.
And that’s all the good I’ll say about Aggies.
By and large, Aggies are pathetic people and I don’t understand them. I was looking at the rabble they call students and I was just bewildered. Hicks, dullards, pseudo-rebels, jack Mormons, degenerates and uglies. Every single one of them.
Their entire identity is that of a whiny, insufferable little sister. They are constantly throwing a tantrum because they live in the shadow of two bigger, better universities. Their only pride comes from envy/hatred (the “yBu” shirts that were so prevalent at the game are evidence).
They’re more animal than the cow that founded their college, and everywhere I looked I saw more and more prime cut, Grade A examples. The Aggie fan who won a contest on the court and then ran over to the BYU student section to give the Degeneration X “Suck it” sign, the group of Aggie students that started to give BYU the bird after a BYU point, and the twenty-something Aggie chick scratching, clawing and swearing at a middle-aged BYU dude after the game (all personally witnessed by yours truly) just confirm that USU students and fans probably shouldn’t be allowed in public.
What’s the deal, Utah State? Why do we BYU fans irk you so much? In the words of Kevin Costner in Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves: “Did we wrong you in another life?”
I just don’t get it. I don’t get their whole mentality. You can’t build a program around hate, it just doesn’t work.
I remember thinking to myself after both this basketball game and the football game back in October that if USU fans could get this emotionally involved and excited for every game—and not just BYU games—then maybe they’ll be able to compete with the Louisiana Techs of the world. They may even make a name for themselves.
But they can’t, and won’t. Aggies are too pathetically simple-minded. They’ll concentrate all their hate and energy on their “Holier than thou” neighbors to the south, and keep being outraged at all the perceived indignities they suffer at the hands of us BYU fans.
And that, to a T, is Aggie Agony—hating us so much, but never, ever being able to do anything about it.