Thursday, June 04, 2009

Thank you Jake!

A little ray of sunshine named Jake Heaps has parted the clouds that hang over LaVell Edwards Stadium.

The latest news is that Jake Heaps will commit to BYU today. He will hold a press conference this afternoon to announce his decision, but local papers are already claiming Heaps will be a Cougar.

Jake Heaps, by the way, is the number one QB prospect in the nation (according to

Thank you for choosing BYU, Jake. We, as fans, won't let you down. I promise.

Now let's talk privately for a bit. I have to ask, Jake... why did you choose BYU? Was it the sexy knee shorts? Did a co-ed escort take you to all the hot religion classes? Actually, I bet it was a Graham Canyon shake at the BYU creamery. That crap would get me to commit to a week's worth of waterboarding.

Whatever the reason, we welcome you to BYU with open arms. Here's hoping you win at LEAST 3 national championships.

Oh, and tell all your big-time buddies to come to BYU too. Thanks.


I just finished watching the press conference and Jake looked like a million bucks. He officially committed to BYU amid raucous applause, and then introduced Texas standout WR Ross Apo and California linebacker Zac Stout who did the same. At the end of the conference all three were smiling from ear to ear, wearing BYU caps and soaking in the cheers.

Good day for BYU football.

1 comment:

bethany said...

holla!! my office helped recruit. you're welcome.